We Kissed an Old Flame. Do I Tell My Present Chap?


Reader Question:

I came across he about two-and-a-half several months in the past. About monthly ago, I asked him if he had been witnessing someone else and he stated no. We mentioned I happened to be perhaps not sometimes.

However, ever since then we’ven’t actually had a “defining the partnership” conversation. The union grew to become intimate, but I feel short-changed in a difficult good sense.

We ran into a vintage flame at a club, and then he ended up strolling me personally home therefore kissed. I really don’t intend to adult date this outdated flame.

Carry out I need to tell the present “guy” about my personal incident? Is this infidelity? So is this guy wasting my time, or can I ask him to “DTR”?

-Dee D. (Ny)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Oh my, Dee. So many concerns. OK, allow me to break this all the way down for you personally. Like so many young women in the usa now just who think feminine sex is equivalent to a guy’s, you engaged in sex before dedication and now tend to be paying the mental cost.

But it’s not very belated to have some meaning. It can take courage. But residing in a low-criteria relationship will hurt you ultimately. And, no, you don’t need to tell the present man regarding the kissy-face aided by the old fire.

But once you have that “defining the relationship” discussion, you better act like a great girl and stay from most of the hot flames, old and brand-new.

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